Life was however not without its pangs of regret. Sometimes I would pose meaninglessly in front of my vase of incredibly rare black tulips: ruing the day I decided to cease doing these things on a daily basis. I felt I was born to undertake this sort of activity, or lack of it. I thought of Mr Dufftown relaxing on a Slumberland divan whilst his sheep nibble away at the remains of his lawn, and thought with practise (a great deal of it) I could be every bit his equal in the inactivity stakes.

There is after all a certain nobility about doing nothing - but doing it very well indeed!  He could be my paradigm for a better life.